The space created by forgetting can be filled with memories or with new creations. Sometimes both. But the last few years have thrown off the natural rhythms of forgetting, creating, and remembering.The problem we’ve encountered during the pandemic isn’t that we forget who we are; it’s that no one has been nearby to remind us.
"Sometimes I think that religious community’s primary function is to hold space for these shifting movements of forgetting, creating, and remembering." YES! I think the rhythms of the liturgical calendar itself are designed for seasons of each of these in their time, and it's my favorite thing about moving through a year in this way.
Answer to Your Question: The thing I often forget about myself is that I have grown, am growing, and will continue to grow.
Easy, Very Tangible Example: Yesterday I really bounded out of bed right when my alarm went off instead of hitting snooze a few times, so I challenged myself to extend my morning run to be longer than usual. It was wonderful, but today my body was a little tired from it. I listened to my body and "phoned it in" on today's run, which looks like doing 4 miles instead of my average 4.5-5.5 for a weekday morning. When I began to mentally scold myself for this, the important reminder that 4 years ago I literally couldn't run for more than 2 minutes at a time slapped me with a much needed reality check of perspective. I forget where I've been SO often, and I forget about my growth. I forget that I am a person who puts in work in order to facilitate that growth. I forget that a year from now I might be in a different place altogether as a result of growth. And I often forget that things are hard BECAUSE I am growing.
Apr 21, 2022·edited Apr 21, 2022Liked by Matt Morris
So interesting that you brought this up. I owned an insurance agency before I retired. I wanted to sell it and was in negotiations regarding the sales price when Covid shut down the country. Six months later my only employee left and I was running the agency alone. I thought about hiring someone, but I didn’t want to start over and decided to sell the agency back to the company.
Getting to the point, I had to close the agency by myself by 11/1/2020. I had 3 months to do it. Just recently I was going through pictures on my phone, you know how you can get sucked into that, and the pictures of closing came up. I marveled that I did that crazy thing of closing my business of 12 years alone. It didn’t seem hard at the time, but looking back I wondered how the heck I did it. The pictures reminded me of myself in that moment and how I just did it, no big deal!!!
I have forgotten my strength, and courage. I lost them during the pandemic. I went into isolation , diagnosed with life altering condition, and felt I would never be strong again. But I am now reaching back out to friends as I find the lost parts of me.
It takes courage to forget, to allow for new possibilities, but it has also taken courage for me to remember the past, complete with the not so good parts, to claim it as my own.
I’ve been planning a trip to Israel for the last couple of years. It’s a bucket list trip my hubby saved for so I could go without him, with a group of from church. My reason for going in the past under the various evangelical churches I attended was to please others…because as I was told, “Of course you want to go to Jesus’ hometown. Every good Christian should want to go”. That soured my desire and I never went.
As I rediscovered my Episcopalian roots, and am completing my 4th year of EFM; I now want to go for spiritual, cultural and historical reasons. I once had a Palestinian patient who lived in Jerusalem and urged me to go so I could get a true sense of the people, their joys, struggles and cultures; without the bias of the Western world.
Growing up in New York City I found adventure daily, from the age of 11, I would take long walks alone to explore neighboring communities; as a 14 year old I took the train from Queens to the Bronx, to a bus over the Palisades to New Jersey. I love to get in my car and drive in the right lane and appreciate the beauty around me. I would take summers off from my home church and visit other places of worship…alone.
I was never afraid to explore on my own. As I’m getting closer to my trip and I’m going without my hubby I feel a sense of panic encroaching. Is this what isolation has done? Have I become tethered to my immediate, familiar world? Will I continue to allow the prejudice I experienced at a small Texas town barbecue restaurant we sought out to experience their community and food, dissuade me. Because I was literally looked over when I went up to place my order because of my Asian heritage and my husband was addressed.
When did I become isolated in this shell? Why did I allow this shell to be placed over my flesh? I want to break free, so I can experience the richness this world and her people has to offer!
I literally stayed up until 1AM today telling myself over and over, “Karen you’re an explorer by nature. You find joy in finding commonalities with all peoples. You can do this!”. Until I fell into a deep sleep.
Thank you for this! And for, reminding me that “emptiness can be the location of transformation and holiness.”
I need to remember that I am likable just as I am. As someone who is a natural born introvert I struggle to feel comfortable around people. Just prior to Covid changing the course of all our lives I recognized that I had become extremely lonely. I intentionally sought out some new “friends” by joining a mindfulness meditation group. I was terrified and at the same time I knew I needed to do something different in order to change what I was feeling. I had forgotten that I am strong, that people like me, I had forgotten to laugh..taking life so seriously. I am remembering that I am a loving, caring and giving human at the same time I am remembering that it’s okay to receive love from others. With Covid I could have gotten side tracked on my quest but rather I continued to recognize what I needed and made the necessary changes in order to remain grounded. This included seeking out other ways to make connections and grow in my faith and relationship with God. When I forget these things I only have to look up and there is someone there to bring me back to this space of knowing my own truth…and I remember once again.
Hey! I’m an artist currently working as an animator and professor, but recently I was reminded of how good it feels to do art just for yourself. In the busy schedule of my everyday routine I often times found myself viewing art and creativity as “The Job” and in the process I kind of lost that creative element that makes art so enjoyable. I’ve been on vacation this last week visiting my cousin in Hawaii, and that gave me the opportunity to disconnect. Suddenly, I found myself gaining new, fresh ideas. For the first time in a while, I picked up my Apple Pencil to draw something not work related, and it felt great. I sat in a coffee shop for 2 hours just immersed drawing on my Ipad. It was a truly refreshing experience.
"Sometimes I think that religious community’s primary function is to hold space for these shifting movements of forgetting, creating, and remembering." YES! I think the rhythms of the liturgical calendar itself are designed for seasons of each of these in their time, and it's my favorite thing about moving through a year in this way.
Answer to Your Question: The thing I often forget about myself is that I have grown, am growing, and will continue to grow.
Easy, Very Tangible Example: Yesterday I really bounded out of bed right when my alarm went off instead of hitting snooze a few times, so I challenged myself to extend my morning run to be longer than usual. It was wonderful, but today my body was a little tired from it. I listened to my body and "phoned it in" on today's run, which looks like doing 4 miles instead of my average 4.5-5.5 for a weekday morning. When I began to mentally scold myself for this, the important reminder that 4 years ago I literally couldn't run for more than 2 minutes at a time slapped me with a much needed reality check of perspective. I forget where I've been SO often, and I forget about my growth. I forget that I am a person who puts in work in order to facilitate that growth. I forget that a year from now I might be in a different place altogether as a result of growth. And I often forget that things are hard BECAUSE I am growing.
So interesting that you brought this up. I owned an insurance agency before I retired. I wanted to sell it and was in negotiations regarding the sales price when Covid shut down the country. Six months later my only employee left and I was running the agency alone. I thought about hiring someone, but I didn’t want to start over and decided to sell the agency back to the company.
Getting to the point, I had to close the agency by myself by 11/1/2020. I had 3 months to do it. Just recently I was going through pictures on my phone, you know how you can get sucked into that, and the pictures of closing came up. I marveled that I did that crazy thing of closing my business of 12 years alone. It didn’t seem hard at the time, but looking back I wondered how the heck I did it. The pictures reminded me of myself in that moment and how I just did it, no big deal!!!
I have forgotten my strength, and courage. I lost them during the pandemic. I went into isolation , diagnosed with life altering condition, and felt I would never be strong again. But I am now reaching back out to friends as I find the lost parts of me.
It takes courage to forget, to allow for new possibilities, but it has also taken courage for me to remember the past, complete with the not so good parts, to claim it as my own.
I’ve been planning a trip to Israel for the last couple of years. It’s a bucket list trip my hubby saved for so I could go without him, with a group of from church. My reason for going in the past under the various evangelical churches I attended was to please others…because as I was told, “Of course you want to go to Jesus’ hometown. Every good Christian should want to go”. That soured my desire and I never went.
As I rediscovered my Episcopalian roots, and am completing my 4th year of EFM; I now want to go for spiritual, cultural and historical reasons. I once had a Palestinian patient who lived in Jerusalem and urged me to go so I could get a true sense of the people, their joys, struggles and cultures; without the bias of the Western world.
Growing up in New York City I found adventure daily, from the age of 11, I would take long walks alone to explore neighboring communities; as a 14 year old I took the train from Queens to the Bronx, to a bus over the Palisades to New Jersey. I love to get in my car and drive in the right lane and appreciate the beauty around me. I would take summers off from my home church and visit other places of worship…alone.
I was never afraid to explore on my own. As I’m getting closer to my trip and I’m going without my hubby I feel a sense of panic encroaching. Is this what isolation has done? Have I become tethered to my immediate, familiar world? Will I continue to allow the prejudice I experienced at a small Texas town barbecue restaurant we sought out to experience their community and food, dissuade me. Because I was literally looked over when I went up to place my order because of my Asian heritage and my husband was addressed.
When did I become isolated in this shell? Why did I allow this shell to be placed over my flesh? I want to break free, so I can experience the richness this world and her people has to offer!
I literally stayed up until 1AM today telling myself over and over, “Karen you’re an explorer by nature. You find joy in finding commonalities with all peoples. You can do this!”. Until I fell into a deep sleep.
Thank you for this! And for, reminding me that “emptiness can be the location of transformation and holiness.”
I need to remember that I am likable just as I am. As someone who is a natural born introvert I struggle to feel comfortable around people. Just prior to Covid changing the course of all our lives I recognized that I had become extremely lonely. I intentionally sought out some new “friends” by joining a mindfulness meditation group. I was terrified and at the same time I knew I needed to do something different in order to change what I was feeling. I had forgotten that I am strong, that people like me, I had forgotten to laugh..taking life so seriously. I am remembering that I am a loving, caring and giving human at the same time I am remembering that it’s okay to receive love from others. With Covid I could have gotten side tracked on my quest but rather I continued to recognize what I needed and made the necessary changes in order to remain grounded. This included seeking out other ways to make connections and grow in my faith and relationship with God. When I forget these things I only have to look up and there is someone there to bring me back to this space of knowing my own truth…and I remember once again.
Hey! I’m an artist currently working as an animator and professor, but recently I was reminded of how good it feels to do art just for yourself. In the busy schedule of my everyday routine I often times found myself viewing art and creativity as “The Job” and in the process I kind of lost that creative element that makes art so enjoyable. I’ve been on vacation this last week visiting my cousin in Hawaii, and that gave me the opportunity to disconnect. Suddenly, I found myself gaining new, fresh ideas. For the first time in a while, I picked up my Apple Pencil to draw something not work related, and it felt great. I sat in a coffee shop for 2 hours just immersed drawing on my Ipad. It was a truly refreshing experience.